Smooch powers

I have a thing with X-men and really with all super heroes.  I love the idea of people with super human abilities, and I wish I had a few, or at least one really good one (NOT mind reading, that would be horrific).  My sister and I had a funny discussion once about our sibling group and what our super hero abilities would or could be.  I was already a mommy, and (among other things) she suggested that my kisses really could have healing power, just like my kids think they do.

Last night in the middle of the night, my 4 year old stumbled into my room, and first over to my husband's side of the bed.  "Oops" he said, and then padded his way over to me.  "Smooch?" he questioned, and I gave him a little kiss and off he went back to bed.  I'm not sure why he needed a kiss in the middle of the night, but I'm glad that last night, I had super power kisses that helped my son to sleep.

I wish my super hero kisses would have been enough to fix Gideon.  I wish my little man's sincere kisses would have been enough to heal Gideon.  I wish we could do "Kiss o war" like I do with my 4 year old, where we see who can get the most kisses in first.  I'd have loved to see Gideon and his older brother try a "kiss of war" and laugh and play together.  As we approach the year mark of his birth, I miss Gideon a lot, and wish I could have seen him grow and change over the last year.  I wish I could have kissed him every day.

At very least, I hope that during the few precious moments I had with my baby, he felt truly loved, wanted, needed, important, and that his pain was made a little bit more bearable by the tender kisses and cuddles we could give him.  A week wasn't even close to enough, but a week is more than some people get, and I am really grateful that we got that much time.

I love you, and I miss you, Gideon.  I'm glad that death isn't a forever loss, but I still miss you.