Yesterday, our family was reading in the Book of Mormon, in Ether chapter 4, and in verse 15 we read the phrase (which is found frequently in the scriptures) "a broken heart and a contrite spirit", and I stopped to ask my children if Heavenly Father always wants us to be sad. After all, a broken heart nearly always implies sadness. They were confused by my question, but I just wanted them to think about it, not to have a great answer. And then it really made me think about it too...because the scriptures also explain to us that "Men are that they might have joy" (2 Nephi 2:25) and those sayings seem a little contradictory. Joseph Smith the prophet said "Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof if we follow the path that leads to it..." How do you have joy and happiness with a broken heart?!
Today, we sang the sacrament hymn number 169, and the last line says "We love thee Lord, our hearts are full, we'll walk thy chosen way." Again...how do you have both a full and a broken heart?!
Perhaps my conundrum is that I am not really understanding the correct meaning of the word "broken" in this context, and perhaps I've been interpreting it incorrectly all along.
Elder Randy D. Funk said "Soil is broken to plant wheat. Wheat is broken to make bread. Bread is broken to become the emblems of the sacrament. When one who is repentant partakes of the sacrament with a broken heart and contrite spirit, he or she becomes whole."
I had not thought of the word "broken" like that...ground is broken. As a gardener, I love to plant seeds, and you have to have decent ground in order to plant seeds and have successful plants. When wheat is "broken" it becomes flour, really it's most usable form. In this context, broken doesn't imply unable to function or hurt or messed up, it means "ready to become what they can be" or even "unlocked potential". Some things (like an egg for eating) can't be used if they aren't broken, and breaking an egg is what unlocks a different purpose than leaving it untouched.
I have very little formal training with horses, but I do have a wonderful aunt who owned a farm, and who taught me how to ride (a little). She knew most girls have a dream to ride horses, and she made sure I got that chance. According to the website animals.mom.com, the term "broke" refers to a horse that is safe to ride and has all his basic manners. Such a horse is familiar with the feeling of a saddle, the weight of a rider, and the cues given by a rider through the reins, the saddle, the legs and their seat. Conversely, an unbroken horse is not considered to be rideable. Sometimes this is just because a horse is too young to be ridden, and so they have not received any training yet. But an adult horse that is not broken is often considered to be of very little value. Here's a link if you want to read a little bit more about this.
Perhaps this definition of broke might also apply--a heart that is well trained would be ready to handle the weight and cues of a Heavenly Father who has a great destination in mind, a heart that is willing to let Him lead instead of just going wherever it wants to go, and consequently a heart that is of more value than one that is "unbroken".
Having had an actual broken heart (like as in sadness) before more than once, I do know that I turned to the Lord an awful lot during those times. I needed the extra help, love, support, and guidance that the Lord had to offer, and I believe He wishes I would always spend so much time reaching out to Him. But I also believe that He wants me to do this when I'm happy, not just when I'm sad, and that sadness is not the only way to "break" a heart.
So...allowing a heart to be willing to become what it can be, to "break" it like when you break ground, or "break" it like when you break an egg to be able to use it, or "break" a horse, training it to allow someone else to lead and guide it. Any one of those versions of a "broken heart" would definitely allow a heart to be full and to experience deep happiness and joy. Finding the answer was probably the easy part. The hard part is the continual quest...to make sure that I truly have a broken heart.
